Is Waiting Better Vs Dating?
One Who's Not a Good Fit
I met Nicole over a decade ago while at a conference in Utah. Over drinks at an outdoor patio, she told me how she met her boyfriend. She was in a bar, chatting up different men. If one wasn't interested, she moved on to one she thought was cute, who was interested. She wasted no time feeling rejected by those who weren't interested. She simply moved on to the next, which was how she met Mike that night. They're still together.
I'm not endorsing to seek in a bar. If it happens, awesome. But, you have myriad opportunities, including dating apps (where I met my guy), where you can cast a wider net.
Waiting...waiting...waiting… Is waiting better than dating someone who isn't right for you?
Yes! It's better to wait and find a good guy who's interesting to you than to tread water with an OK fit, who will ultimately cost you more emotionally and in time in the long run.
Just as I wrote about dating 3 men at the same time to save yourself y e a r s (that post is here, too), it may feel like a conundrum to wait, but I have reasons:
1. If you're dating 3 men at once, you'll give each of them 3 dates before setting them free if they aren't for you. #integritymatters
2. Dating a guy you're not that psyched about is energy draining. It's not life affirming. #lifeisshort
3. This is a long game, meaning date someone you can see yourself with in the future. The 3 date rule will inform that. #strategy
By waiting, I'm not saying take no action! Action is required if you are seeking anything. You know that. :)
If taking action is difficult for you or if you are very busy because you like to have your dance card full at-all-times, here are some baby steps to begin the process towards balance:
Make plans to get out if you tend to not want to. Write about what was positive about the experience, then plan another outing.
If you like to be busy at all times, set up an at-home date night with yourself. Plan that as you would anything else. Make it fun. Repeat.
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